12 Years Straight Journey

It's March 1,2012 and wow, I feel quite excited as it's getting closer and closer each day to finally put a pause on my 12 years straight journey developing and debugging systems. I shall say, the entire years caused my brains jumping almost everyday analyzing, catching and fixing bugs as well as formulating logic of the system. Not to mention how many cups of coffee invested on my body for it to produce ideas and techniques that actually helped me to cope up the stress it caused me. My first 5 years of swimming codes left me hungry to gain more experience. I have felt my willingness to explore more, know more, and apply all the skills that I have in many possible ways. It was those years that I was introduced to Oracle PL/SQL programming and other stuffs related to it. It was giving me unique experience, the pressure and urge of building and developing systems was such an amazing thrill. Also a plus factor the comments I am receiving from friends that what I was doing for a profession was totally cool. In other words, a totally geek, nerd thing.

 My 6th up to 10th year on this profession brought me to a different level of experience. Aside from learning another programming language using Progress 4GL Software, I was introduced to Management world, how to get along with customers, co-managers, how others biting you behind your back, and how to mentor junior programmers. In other words, I went out from hiding inside a shell and revealed myself and what I am capable of. From being aloof to suddenly exposed a little more confidence when facing the world. That level of confidence brought me to a new opportunity working abroad. The experience was a bittersweet for me. I need to work doubled to make others see my worth and for not causing them regrets why they hired me.I need to guard all my directions or else someone might take an opportunity grabbing the credit and stab your back (not literally but figuratively). Knowing that I'm working in a foreign land, away from people that I loved was emotionally excruciating. Not to mention the important occasions that I've missed, the sense of belongingness wasn't there, and that every night all alone by myself  in the room feeling sometimes trapped and contained in a very small box. Indeed it was such unbearable even just thinking about it and will never choose to be in that position again if given an option. But I struggled very hard for me to survive and for me to finish my 2 years contract. I thought I won't make it but yes I did and I am so proud of myself. I was able to meet our plans, I was able to provide more and with my family's determination, we were able to acquire a place we can call our very own home. If there's any regret that I have in my heart for being away for two years, it would be missing the each day growing of my precious little one. Soon I will go back and I will try my very best to catch up as much as I can and show my love and care deeper each day, for a lifetime.